Leave it to Cleaver

Did this ever really happen?

Those of us old enough to even remember the TV show "Leave it to Beaver" usually have a definite opinion about it: you probably either loved it or hated it. I actually don't remember ever watching it, since I never even watched any TV until they put one in my college dorm living room. We all piled in there to watch the weekly Batman series - the original, funny one! But I digress...

I'm willing to guess that most of you have seen Cleaver (Galium aparine), in your yard or elsewhere, and that you are not fond of it. It's one of our notorious, crawling weeds here in the Northwest. This stuff must have been designed by a genius because it grows in poor soil, in sunny or shady areas, and produces thousands of sticky seeds, that love to get on your socks in late summer. Our cats frequently carry around enough Cleaver seed to stick to the side of the house....

Four to eight Cleaver stems radiate out from the central root and can reach several feet in length. They grow right over other plants, due to the thousands of sticky hairs covering the stems and leaves. Luckily, they are not toxic like stinging nettles.

All is not lost though. Cleaver is edible, but best when cooked to eliminate the sticky hairs. Being a member of the Rubiaceae family (same as coffee), the dried seeds can be roasted and used as a low caffeine beverage in place of coffee. And finally, this lowly weed has quite a few medicinal uses for skin ailments, is a diuretic, and a mild sedative.

So, in conclusion, in spite of the mentioned benefits of Cleaver, you probably don't want to "leave it to cleaver" unless you: a) have goats; or b) have geese. Apparently geese really like the stuff - so much so that in some areas it's called "goosegrass."

Growing up a stump fence.

Leaves, flowers, and hairs.

Stem tip and tiny white flowers.

Massive spread of Cleaver on top of Vinca major.
This covers about 1/2 acre, under trees.